Don't Watch This Movie

Don't Watch This Movie
2000, Armageddon Entertainment

Reviewed By: P.T.
On: 12/05/01

	Produced by:	Tom Byron
	Directed by:	Derek Newblood
	Starring:	Anastasia Blue, Kno Malone, Bridget Powerz, Suzanne Storm, Kristi Myst, Tom Byron, Luciano, Brandon Iron, Mark Wood, Brian Surewood, Jay Ashley, Trevor, D.K., Dick Nasty
	Directing:	4
	Production:	3
	Storyline:	3
	Music:	4
	Editing:	4
	Costumes:	3
	Dialogue:	4

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Anastasia Blue with Tom Byron
Kno Malone with D.K. and Trevor
Bridget Powerz with Dick Nasty and Trevor
Suzanne Storm with Brian Surewood and Jay Ashley
Kristi Myst with Luciano, Mark Wood and Brandon Iron

Review:

Scene 3 - other=midget

I'm not sure what to call this type of video except, good. Derek Newblood takes one gonzo scene and four vignettes, has Rob Black introduce each scene, and ends up with a very entertaining film. Rob Black is unashamed, unabashed and funny. It's easy to tell that he's having fun being the bad boy of porn and wrestling. He was born to play these roles, loving the fact that he can be as outspoken as he wants to be and then put it all off as an act.

The first scene features Anastasia Blue choking on Tom Byron's cock and then taking it up her ass. Whenever Anastasia is in a scene, you can count on high energy. She'll get as nasty as any girl in porn and I don't think it makes any difference to her if the camera's on or not, she does this because she enjoys it.

Kno Malone is DK's fiancée, but he's pissed because she can't even keep the toilet clean. After he shoves her head in the bowl, DK and his buddy Trevor strip her down and fuck her on the bathroom floor. I guess the reason DK invited Trevor is that he couldn't get hard enough to fuck her himself. I wonder if Trevor's going to do the honors on their wedding night.

Next we've got Bridget Powerz being awakened by her husband(Dick Nasty) and his drunken buddy Trevor (this guy gets around). Bridget's mad as hell and decides to make the boys fuck her. She may be a midget, but that doesn't slow her down as she takes everything the guys can dish out. Being an Armaggedon production, they don't think twice about having Bridget stand behind both guys and lick their asses, then getting Dick down on his hands and knees so Bridget can sit on his back while she blows Trevor.

The fourth scene runs like this…Suzanne Storm is Jay Ashley's mail order bride. Jay is telling Brian Surewood that she's only good for sex and can't cook or clean. About that time Suzanne asks the guys which side of the bread the peanut butter goes on for the sandwich she's making. They think that she should just concentrate on what she knows best and they take in the kitchen. After a total fucking, including a DP, the boys fix a peanut butter and cum sandwich for her to eat.

For the grand finale, Luciano, Brandon and Mark decide to rob a church so they can buy some smoke. When they're unable to find anything valuable they take it out on the nun(Kristi Myst) who's alone in the church with them. The boys take turns with her, DP her and then cum on her face and crucifix. Kristi plays the perfect victim/submissive.

While he shows all the irreverence of a Zupko, Newblood presents it in a much less frenzied manner. That's not to say he doesn't get his jabs in, mostly for the legalization of pot, but he concentrates more on the sex. Newblood does a great job of capturing the heat, with first rate camera and editing work. The techno-pop music is low enough not to drown out the live sounds, but maintains a nice rhythm for the action. The girls are hot and, with one exception, the guys are seriously hard-driving studs.

This may be a little tame for Extreme/Armaggedon, but it plays very well. Start to finish, Newblood follows the theme and delivers a movie that would be a plus in any porn maven's library.

PT says 4, a little something for everyone.

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Review: